I’m not so good at goodbyes. Actually, I’m not so good at hellos, how-are-yous and everything else in between. Talking to people, really. All that eye contact is hard to […]
Abstract Academic: Riding my laptop into the sunset
Tag: Abstract Academic
Abstract Academic: Airballs and padded walls
Basketball, Columns, Opinion, Sports
I found myself pounding up the floor, the ball floating beneath my hand like a yo-yo, the Pleasant View sixth-grade championship within reach. Only one defender stood in my way, […]
Abstract Academic: That's "Cheez," with a Z
Hi. My name is Kory, and I am a culinary moron. I’ve always been this way. Something about the way root beer tickles my throat just sends me over the […]
Abstract Academic: I'd do anything for love, except for most things
I’ve been teaching English this semester at a local high school, and the experience working with high school seniors has taught me a few things about love. Whoa! Wait! Not […]
Abstract Academic: Finding a cure for Saduary-itis
If you haven’t already noticed, you’ve been feeling pretty blue this week. Don’t worry; it’s not your fault. What? You say you’ve been doing OK? Your new workout routine seems […]
Abstract Academic: The best advice is unsolicited
My mother raised me well. Well, to be more precise, my mother raised me effectively. For instance, I was always expected to hold the church door open for the old […]
Abstract Academic: Baby needs to pull his weight
This week’s column was supposed to be a real tear-jerker. I had planned on recounting, moment by precious moment, the birth of my son. He was due to emerge on […]
Abstract Academic: Oh, (fill in the blank) University, we love thee!
Why should you, the average high-school senior, decide to attend school in Utah? Here’s why. Utah schools are the tops! Literally! We here at the Organization of Higher Educators’ Council […]
Abstract Academic: Sweet, bro!
Has this ever happened to you? You’re a girl (which I know rules out about half of you), and you’re on a date, and the guy pulls into your driveway […]
Abstract Academic: In which the turkey defends his right not to be eaten
Greetings, friends, ladies and gentle-creatures of the Grand Forest Council. Chairman Raccoon, Vice President Spotted Owl and Secretary Ground Squirrel, I thank you for putting off more popular issues like […]